Our ASLD Angel

Many of you know that my favorite word is HOPE. We have so much HOPE for Hayden. In June, I had a lot of hope. I had hopes of Disney World, swimming, buying tricycles, and dirt piles in my back yard. I had hopes of Hayden having extra siblings within 2 years of his life. All of these hopes were part of our “perfect” dream world. At this point, I guess I probably took the little things in life for granted. I have always been a girl that “Dreams Big.” The word HOPE changed in my vocabulary when Hayden was 5 weeks old. I was sick of seeing him jerk with the “hiccups.” Everybody thought that I was exaggerating. Lauren, he is just fine. Sadly, I was not convinced. I decided to Google jerking babies on the internet to watch you tube videos. I immediately called everyone to tell them that I had diagnosed Hayden with a seizure disorder. What do you think I got again? Calm down Lauren. Once again, I was not convinced so we showed some friends a video. They informed us that the video we took was definitely a seizure. Off to Batson we went! Sure enough it was seizures. We were checking in the hospital. At this moment, I still had a lot of hope. I still believed that my life was perfect. The nurses helped me gain more hope. They kept informing me that seizures are so common. Often kids outgrow them within a year of life. Okay, that’s going to be us. The seizures are just a minor setback to my perfect little world.

On day three of our visit everything was still testing normal. They said let us do an MRI of the brain to make sure everything is clear before we send you home. HMM that’s the day the word HOPE changed in our vocabulary. Hayden had bilateral white matter damage. Really, Will he ever walk? Usually not. Will he ever talk? Probably not. Will he live a normal life? Doubtful. I lost all hope. Our life was over. My brother and his girlfriend gave me a bracelet that day. It was a simple hope bracelet. It was purple and hot pink and looked like a rubber band. Every time I lost hope the bracelet would help me gain it back. I had a few people in the months of waiting on a diagnosis ask me, what is that bracelet? I would explain that it is my comfort zone. It reminded me that I can still have hope for Hayden.

My dreams did change on July 20^th. My goals changed also. Luckily, the one thing that changed the most is the real meaning of Hope. Hope now means that I believe in Hayden. Hope means that I am appreciative of the small things in life. Hope is a miracle. Hope is hearing the words mommy and daddy. Hope means we will play baseball one day together. I cannot guarantee that this will happen on Earth. I can guarantee that it will happen in heaven. Hope makes me realize that life is a precious gift. Hope makes me realize that I don’t have to take one day at a time. As Dr. Gillespie told me, I can take a half day at a time or even an hour at a time. Hope also makes me cherish each smile and each coo. Hope also reminds me that you cannot take life for granted. You must live each day to its fullest. You must cherish every memory. You must give all your faith to God. You must trust in God. You must remember that God will never give you more than you can handle. I HOPE that each of my friends will remember that life is a precious gift from God. I have HOPE that Hayden will change many lives. I firmly believe that he will make people appreciate the simple things in life. I have HOPE that Hayden will impact lives around the country. Thank you, Hayden Brent for making me a better person today. Thank you, Hayden for allowing your daddy to be an awesome person too. Thank you for being our precious gift from God. Thank you, God for trusting us with your special and uniquely made Earth Angel. I might have “Dreamed Big” in June, but I “DREAM LARGER” now! I believe in miracles and I hope you do tooJ

· I am looking forward to ordering some Hope 4 Hayden bracelets to give to all of our friends and family in the near future.

I have HOPE that we will ALL see Hayden walk and run!

I have HOPE that God will give us more amazing days with this awesome blessing.

I have HOPE that God will not allow Hayden to be in pain or suffer.

I have HOPE that Hayden is changing lives both young and old. Thank you to an amazing group of girls for thinking of Hayden. Thank you girls for giving me the idea. Sorry I had to steal it:)

I have HOPE that I will continue to see little miracles and blessings. Look at this amazingly beautiful hand.

I have HOPE that Hayden is supported by many.

I have HOPE that if you take the small things in life for granted that you will learn to appreciate the little blessings that we often overlook everyday. I have HOPE that many parents will raise their kids to love unconditionally like the mother of these two girls. A recent conversation with them:

Chloe what are you? My GanGan's Heart

Chloe what is AMO? My GanGan's Angel

Chloe what is Lilly? My GanGan's Sunshine

Chloe what is Mary? My GanGan's Star

Okay this is the one that gets me the most: Chloe what is Hayden? My EARTH ANGEL.

Children are never to early to learn respect, life lessons, and prayers.

This is coming from the same child that prays for Hayden everytime she sees a penny. I have HOPE that I can be half the mom that Lisa is to these girls. I have HOPE that these girls will always love Hayden (their Earth Angel) Unconditionally!